I’m not one of those people that life doesn’t throw anything at you which you can’t handle, or that everything happens for a reason. I think that’s the kind of thing we say to other people to make them and ourselves feel better, but in reality things just happen without predetermination. History unfolds as we make it, minute by minute and decision by decision. Sometimes people are handed more hardship than they can handle at that point, and they need help. And sometimes they don’t get this help, and they sink.
We can recover from failure. It’s not fun, and we are probably changed forever, but it doesn’t mean we can’t have another start. We take detours, we stumble, we double back, we fall and get up. If we have vision, luck, or help, and preferably all three, we can have another go and create something that is of lasting value to ourselves.
I also believe that we tend to overlook opportunities around us. One thing I’m very good at, for whatever mysterious reason, is looking at a situation and thinking: What are the opportunities here? How can we turn this problem into a solution? Is this a constraint or a resource? I’ve trained myself to think this way, and it’s tremendously useful. Not every problem can be turned around with this sort of aikido, but many become much more manageable.
Moreover, that approach fosters a mental attitude of receptivity, of looking for gems in the dirt. The dirt is still there, but unless you’re looking for them you will rarely just stumble upon the gems. I freely admit that I’m a very lucky person by any standard; but I believe my greatest luck is having the capacity to look for and notice this good fortune when it is nearby.
This is not some sort of “you make your own luck”, “The Secret” kind of positive thinking clap-trap that provides a pat on the back to the fortunate and a boot to the head to those down on their luck. I’m just suggesting that all else being equal, we have every advantage in looking for the hidden opportunities rather than waiting for Lady Luck.
